


Heartache On the Big Screen

by 666kags



Series: bokuaka heaven [1]
Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: Angst, M/M, akaashi breaks everyone's heart, this is all angst im sorry
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-06-08
Updated: 2020-06-08
Packaged: 2021-03-04 04:40:58
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,219
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24617740
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/666kags/pseuds/666kags
Summary: “If you’re going to improvise lines at least make sure they correlate to the plot, especially if you’re going to use that as an excuse to break up with me."orThe one where Bokuto and Akaashi are famous actors starring in the same movie about estranged lovers. It's after they film their breakup scene that Bokuto realizes that none of Akaashi's lines were scripted.
Relationships: Akaashi Keiji/Bokuto Koutarou, Akaashi Keiji/Kuroo Tetsurou
Series: bokuaka heaven [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1779838
Kudos: 17





	Heartache On the Big Screen

**Author's Note:**

> this is my first time publishing something I've written lmao pls don't bully me

December 14, 2019

“Maybe I loved you more than you ever did me.”

Bokuto spoke performing to the best of his ability. He and Akaashi were currently working on a movie about love, heartbreak, and everything in between. The role Bokuto had to embrace for this project was rather challenging especially since he had to pretend to fall out of love with the one person he loved most.

“You’re loud, you live in the moment, and somehow you can captivate a whole room just by walking in. I’m not meant for you.”

Akaashi sighed his eyes were full to the brim with tears but his facial expression remained stoic. “I’m starting to wonder if I ever truly loved you to begin with." The raven-haired man delivered his lines effortlessly. 

“After all we’ve been through you’re just going to give up? Just like that?” Bokuto continued to spew his lines as he made the motions the writers had written in the script. “If you never loved me why are you still here?” he finished. 

Akaashi looked away from Bokuto also following the motions written in the script. “I stayed because without you I was nobody. I stayed because I didn’t know how to leave.” Only the faint breathes of the two actors could be heard on set. The scene had ended. The director called cut and the famous couple was done for the day. 

Akaashi walked off set immediately heading to his dressing room. He had cried the entire scene leaving his appearance a complete mess. He whispered I’m sorry into the empty room as he took off his makeup and clothes. He quickly changed into his regular clothing wanting to escape the movie’s set before anyone could speak to him. Akaashi had felt an enormous amount of feelings that day all in front of people he’d prefer not to be emotional in front of but his face had remained the same. 

As the raven-haired boy moved to open the door it was instead pulled open by the one person Akaashi didn’t want to see. Bokuto looked at him in the eye as he closed the door behind him. Akaashi moved from his position in front of his boyfriend to the small couch in the cold room of the studio. “Bokuto I-“ 

“If you’re going to improvise lines at least make sure they correlate to the plot, especially if you’re going to use that as an excuse to break up with me,” the owl-eyed man exasperated. “I guess you were right, we aren’t meant to be together.” 

Bokuto was hurt. His boyfriend’s words cut through Akaashi like a hot knife cutting glass. Akaashi let out a sigh, he knew Bokuto deserved an explanation but the lump in Akaashi’s throat wouldn’t allow him to say the words he wanted. “Guess’m glad to know that’s how you really feel.” Bokuto opened the door and walked out of the room. 

The pair left the studio separately that night each knowingly missing the presence of the other. Akaashi wouldn’t allow himself to regret his decision despite how much his heart ached or how much he missed the older. He’d hurt Bokuto but he’d accepted the kind of person his now ex-boyfriend was. Bokuto would find someone who was perfect for him in due time and Akaashi had accepted that. He knew Bokuto will find happiness in the long run even if it isn’t with him. 

-

December 14, 2020 

It had been months since they filmed their break up scene which Akaashi had blatantly ruined. The director however expressed to the pair that he admired the talent and raw emotion put into the scene. The scene was used for the movie even though certain parts of the project had to be tweaked to cater to it. Bokuto was going to be broken up with in front of millions of people. Their breakup will forever be memorialized in the form of a coming of age movie scene. Akaashi didn’t know if he was angry with himself for the execution of their breakup or if he wanted to cry because the world would see a side of him he never intended to show. In the end, it didn’t matter how he felt because he wasn’t the one getting their heartbroken on the big screen. Over the course of twelve months, Bokuto had slowly distanced himself from Akaashi and everything associated with their relationship. The media had caught wind of their breakup almost immediately after it happened, leaving them little to no time until they both had to make official statements. They had been the it couple of the industry for almost ten years and with time their careers became intertwined. It’d be years until they’d be able to read their own name without mention of the other. The premiere of the movie was an adventure, to say the least. Akaashi sat next to his costar the entire night and mingled with their shared friends. The night was comfortable but the tension between the ex-lovers lingered. Bokuto left the after-party early with someone Akaashi could only assume he’d met in the twelve months they haven’t been together. It was irritating to watch his ex-boyfriend leave with a stranger but it wasn’t his place to feel that way. Akaashi had made the decision to end their relationship and he wouldn’t allow himself to hurt Bokuto more than he already had. 

“It’s your night don’t look so gloomy, you’ll age prematurely,” a tall man with cat-like eyes and a sardonic smile said while seating himself next to Akaashi. The man was Kuroo Tetsurou, Bokuto’s best friend and longest friend next to Akaashi. If the night had been up to the status quo Kuroo would’ve been absent having found his company for the night well before the after-party but instead deciding to celebrate his time with his best friends. “Two years ago if someone told me I’d see Bokuto leave his own after-party with someone other than you I would’ve laughed in their face. In my mind, there wasn’t a world where you and him weren’t right next to each other hell I didn’t even believe Bokuto when he told me you two broke up.” 

“Nothing is ever really meant to be I guess”, Akaashi scoffed. The words came off bitter and they left a sour taste in his mouth. He had no right to be angry. He had no right to judge Bokuto for seemingly moving on. “You and I both know you love to believe in that soulmate bullshit so who are you trying to fool?” Akaashi laughed at Kuroo’s remark feeling a little lighter than before the man decided to sit with him. “Now I know I’m not the prince you’re looking for but if you don’t mind may I have this dance?” The tall black-haired man stuck out his hand to Akaashi and the raven-haired boy happily accepted his request. The two danced and drank for hours eventually both deciding they’d leave the party together. They spent the rest of the night in Akaashi’s bed limbs intertwined. 

Bokuto spent the same night in bed with a man he didn’t love. He shared his body with someone he didn’t intend to ever speak to again. He gave every bit of himself to Akaashi but refused to let himself stop and let it hurt. The stranger had hair slightly lighter than Akaashi’s and his eyes weren’t as piercing but being next to him made the pressure in Bokuto’s chest lessen. The smell of the apartment wasn’t the same as Akaashi’s. Nothing was the same, nothing would ever be the same without the raven-haired boy by his side as his friend or as his lover. Bokuto cried that night alone in the bathroom of man he barely knew the name of. He was a strong person but even the strongest of people crumble. 

-

Morning came too soon. The light shined through Akaashi’s windows illuminating the figure sleeping under him. He carefully got out of Kuroo’s grip not wanting to wake him up. Akaashi went about his morning normally. The raven-haired boy knew that once Kuroo left his apartment every article with their names on it would be a mess. Akaashi was never one to google his lovers or ex-lovers in this case but after he saw Bokuto leave with someone last night it was too tempting not to. He walked into his office sitting in front of his laptop and quickly typed in the password. His fingers moved so fast Akaashi himself could barely register what he was doing. As soon as the search had loaded articles and pictures of Bokuto leaving the apartment of the guy he left with last night appeared. Akaashi’s breathing hitched, he couldn’t breathe and he didn’t know why he felt like this. He broke up with Bokuto and then hooked up with his best friend so why did he feel angry? “Please you’re just torturing yourself at this point.” The voice of the man that slept with Akaashi all night boomed through his ears. Tears fell from his eyes, tears he didn’t know he was holding back. “I broke up with him. I was the one that said I didn’t love him and now I dragged you into the mess I created.“ 

“Would you shut up,” Kuroo’s voice was rough but it was calm. He didn’t say anything he only looked at Kuroo. “I’m tired of your stupid justification for breaking up with the literal love of your life and I’m tired of dealing with Bokuto being an emo idiot when it’s so painfully obvious that you should be together. Seriously get a grip and just admit you love the guy. If not for his sake then for mine.” Akaashi felt like his stomach was going to leap out of his mouth. He didn’t know what to say but he knew Kuroo was right. 

The two black haired men stared at each other for what felt like minutes. Words rushed out of Akaashi’s mouth. “But after last night how can I even look him in the eye I-“ 

“We both fucked up but don’t forget what he was doing last night either. You’re a grown man Akaashi and so am I we knew it was wrong and we still did it so there’s no need to regret what we can’t change.” Kuroo words did nothing to relieve the stress Akaashi was feeling. Akaashi nodded hoping that if his relationship with Bokuto couldn’t be saved at least Bokuto could find it in him to forgive his best friend. 

The day had passed and Akaashi was now alone in his apartment again. The apartment was quiet. The silence was unbearable after living with Bokuto for so many years. Akaashi sat on the couch staring at his phone. He had Bokuto’s contact open. One-click and he’d be able to hear his voice. One movement of his hand and he’d be able to tell Bokuto he was sorry for hurting him in more ways than one. Or one click and the voice would never come, there was only one way to find out. Akaashi clicked the little phone icon and let his phone ring. Ring. Ring. Ring. “Hello.” The voice said. 

“Bokuto… I- I’m sorry.” Akaashi whispered afraid that if he spoke too loud his voice would betray him. “I know you are baby.” Bokuto’s voice was soft and it was gentle. Akaashi wanted him to be angry. He wanted Bokuto to yell at him not comfort him. “I love you so much Akaashi but-“

“I love you so much Bokuto. I broke up with you because I was afraid I couldn’t give you the love you deserve. I know I don’t deserve it but please I just want us to go back to normal.” Akaashi cried. 

“Akaashi we… we can’t. We can’t be together anymore.” 

Akaashi sobbed listening to the words leaving Bokuto’s mouth. He couldn’t see. He couldn’t breathe. “What was I thinking? Did I really just ask you that? Good god, I’m so fucking pathetic.” Akaashi laughed into the phone. His tears ran down his face as he laughed at the irony of Bokuto saying they couldn’t be with each other. This is what you wanted so why are you crying? Akaashi thought. 

“I’m sorry I called.” 

The had call ended. The day had ended. Bokuto and Akaashi had officially ended their relationship for good. 

-

November 29, 2026 

Akaashi shuffled through his mail opening each envelope and carefully reading the words sealed in them. Most of them he knew were bills but one stood out from the rest. It was a small black envelope with two white and gold ribbons tied around it. Akaashi untied the ribbons and opened the strange little envelope. It was a picture and an invitation. The invitation was for a wedding, Bokuto’s wedding. The wedding was set for December fourteenth. Akaashi smiled happy that Bokuto had finally found his happiness. The picture was of Bokuto, Kuroo, and the man Akaashi assumed was to marry his former lover. He turned the picture of the three men over and read the note in Bokuto’s handwriting. 

“Thank you for being my friend, for being my lover, for breaking my heart, but most importantly of all thank you for the best years of life.”

**Author's Note:**

> thank you for reading <33


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